Ím Born Again.

Today, I got baptized.
And on Easter Sunday/Resurrection Day it means even more to me than I can fully put into words.

This day isn’t just about tradition. It’s about transformation.
It’s about death to the old me, and the rebirth of the version of me that God always intended.

When you know you’re called…
When you know God’s hand is on your life…
But the fruit isn’t showing up?
That will break you in ways people don’t see.

It’s like life just keeps knocking you down.
And after a while, you start wondering,
When is it going to be my turn?

I’ve been there. I was there.
Trying everything to fix it. To fix me.
I’ve been there. I was there.
Trying everything to fix it. To fix me.

I tried routines.
I tried productivity.
I tried clean eating.
I tried Pilates.
I drank tea. I journaled. I breathed deeply.
I tried to smile through it. Manifest through it. Pretend it was okay.

But nothing worked.

And I realized the only thing that can fix this is God.
Not a version of Him I could keep at a distance.
But the real, resurrecting, healing Jesus Christ who loves me in my brokenness.

If you’ve ever felt like that too like you’ve tried everything and your soul still feels heavy.
Maybe this is your sign.
As I sat in my seat this morning and the pastor made the altar call, I felt the pull.
That quiet, undeniable tug in my spirit.
And yet, I made every excuse not to go.

What if my hair gets wet?
My family is going to be waiting so long for me.
I have work later. Maybe another time.
Maybe next month ..…

…… Friend whose to say you will even see next month? 

Get what you need now!!! 

The enemy will always try to distract you right at the edge of your breakthrough.
But God was calling me and this time, I refused to sit still.

I stood up.
I walked forward.
I confessed my sins before the congregation.
I gave my life to Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.
And then, I changed into my all white.
White to symbolize surrender. Purity. A fresh start.
And I stepped into the water to be baptized.

I’ve been fighting so many battles lately—silently.
I’ve been working hard, praying hard, trying to stay strong.
And lately, I feel like I’m this close to finally receiving something that’s good for me.
Not just exciting. Not just temporary.
But something real. Something safe. Something covered by God.

And that’s all I really want.
I want to know I’m safe.
I want to know that if anything happens to me, I lived this life choosing God every single day and that my soul is His.

It was nothing but God who kept me.
In my lowest seasons, my most confusing seasons, in the moments no one else knew about—He was still there.

I know God gives us free will. He’s not a forceful God. He’s gentle. He waits for us to choose Him ,and I’ve chosen Him.

But I also know the enemy plays by invitation.
Demons don’t just “show up”—they’re let in.
And I’ve let some things in before.
I’ve given access to people, to thoughts, to habits that never had my best interest.
But when I went down in that water—everything else lost its grip.

Because once you’re baptized, once you make that decision, once you publicly declare, “Jesus is Lord”—nothing else matters.

When I went under, I left it all there.
The fear. The guilt. The shame. The old version of me who thought she had to earn God’s love.

And when I came back up, I came up forgiven.
I came up born again.
I came up brand new.

The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5:17,
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”

That’s me now.

I know I made the devil mad today.
And I also know I made my Father in heaven proud.
I’m not doing this for applause. I’m doing this to honor God, to set an example for my younger siblings, and to claim everything He has promised me.

No more running.
No more waiting until the “right time.”

And just like that—while we were celebrating the resurrection of Jesus Christ, I was publicly resurrecting me.